Alice in Wonderland , The Review

This can be very short.  Burton+Depp=Flawless. Period, done, end,finish, nuff  said, fait, getan, fin, terminado, rampung, entek. I dont have to testify how this movie portrayed a dream as best as we could ask, so i thought i was having a chill dream for hundred minutes instead of watching movie in a rather cold theater.  And watching this movie alone from a corner isolated from the others, only with a box of popcorn and a bottle of apple tea simply making it more personal, intimate, and sacred. Nah, it wasn't like what you think, no pervert material on this movie, not even a few, unless u have old memory about how sexy Anne Hathaway's breast is (sorry to say that in this movie Anne seemed to be breastless) , or you have a sexual obsession with a talking pussy. So no, you get it wrong if you think i was masturbating there down the corner. I had not even to struggle back againts the time to find my best smile and my big relief honest hard childhood laughter. Thing i had never get from a movie. Not since another Burton-Depp's Charlie and Chocolate Factory.

I also don't need to tell that the casting is very strong. Helena Bonham Carter, another Burton's favourite, is surely one of Hollywood's most underrated actresses. She's pretty consistent with her wacko cast since her perfect performance in Fight Club a decade ago. And for her Red Queen cast in this movie, she managed to maintain her acting on the highest level. Mia? nothing wrong with her. She's fitter to be called Alice than Mia. Shadow on her eyes and her british accent succeeded to make her charming. To  be honest i didn't enjoy the animation version of Alice in Wonderland broadcasted by national channel back days when i was a kid, and Mia did make me falling in love to Alice. Adventurous girl who hates corset, stocking and believes as many as six impossible things before breakfast. Ah not to forget, she prefer wandering abroad to marrying a lord. The other highlight was not Anne Hathaway. It's the voice of absoleum, the blue catterpilar. The voice that could kill is Severus Snape's (Alan Rickman), heavy low and beautiful at the same time, and i'm not talking about Frank Sinatra. Johnny? Well, what can I say? The Burton's first man was at his usual outstanding shape. I dont even think Jim Carrey could do Mad Hatter better than him. And when Jim couldn't, means nobody could. And that's including Tukul too.

The Burton's dense and consistent idealism is another thing  I dont have  to mention here.  He's the god of fairy tale. We'd better keep him under the roof anywhere he goes, so he cannot rise to heaven and so he can makes another movie for us. Like i said, the motion picture, the color, setting, plot is very beautiful and there's no pervert content at all, let alone sex scene. Well, some scene involved violence indeed. But so did Tom & Jerry. I say, its watchable for everyone, including kids. What about the story? What about it?  It's a perfect classic fairy tale story. No more or less. You may say it's so predictable. So what? Whadaya expect from a fairy tale? You can predict the end easily like piece of cake yet you're gonna like it like piece of cake as well.  Because the main issue is imaginary world, this movie can be easily compared with Pandora in James Cameron's splendid Golden Globe Winner 'Avatar'. They are both beautiful world we could only dream of. But that's all. In almost all other aspects, Alice simply outclass Jake Sully and co. The creatures and characters are so impressive as well. The Tweedles, Malynkum, McTwisp, Bandersnatch, Jabberwocky, Frabjous Day wew, they're perfectly pictured. I even love the way it sounds. For me it's an Oscar winner  picture already. A Masterpiece.

The last thing that i dont actually need to confess is that the script is brilliant. The dialog is smart and hillarious, fit with the victorian era settting. Yet they're very beautiful to hear as well. It's like enjoying Shakespeare's script of play. Seemed like everybody have to say everything unusually and sarchastically. 'Why is it you're always too small or too tall?' 'Have you any idea why a raven is like a writing desk?' 'You used to be much more..."muchier." You've lost your muchness.' Superb. goodbye pragmatism! And for the climax, the futterwhacken dance is mindblowing! So if you think you can dance, you must watch Hatter's futterwhacken.

Hence, This can be very short.  Burton+Depp=Flawless.Period, done, end,finish, nuff  said, fait, getan, fin, terminado, rampung, entek.

i rate 16,5 of 10 ( anyone miss the movie, will be burnt in hell )

Coogan's Bluff, the review

 Wew, when this movie was made, my grandpa were still peeing on his pant *gee,hope you're not a blogger grandpa, and New York's still nothing but trees and monkeys, and you?! you're still only a grain of protein somewhere. Don't blame me, blame Cinemax for their oldschool, not to say ancient, collection. Mr Wild Wild West, Clint Eastwood (Coogan), is the center of the movie. I could even hardly recognize Clint if it's not because his sexy mole on his upper lips. I dont believe he looked so young, err like 42 years a go?!  . Long, tall and just as sturdy as Lorenzo Lamas. Err, of course Lorenso Lamas at his sturdy years back days, not now. And without his tawdry long hair too. Being clueless about the other casts, I'm pretty sure Clint is the only survivor from this movie.

Actually, there's nothing special if we're talking about the story, plot or set. It's a boring American dream of an invicible hotshot. He has six packed belly, two big packed rectangle breast, firm jaw, strong angled cheekbones, and of course yummy-butt. Not to mention his sweet mole that would complete a dream boy Paris Hilton likes to sleep with every night and day. I mean sleep after make some candid porn movie as usual. He's bad too. And bad is good for a horny blonde. And yes, just like every bad boy, he's a flamboyant womanizer. And Coogan Cassanova practically snogged every pretty girl in this movie. That's all folks, what one and half hour of picture told me.

However, inspite of anything, there's something about this movie. I believe the magic is due to the polaroid coloring technique.  I dont think they did it intentionally. It's just the mark from the past, and it's happened to be very vintage and beautiful. Technically this movie is perfect in my opinion, considering it made in 1968, yet it still very enjoyable until now and then. And i found a very great scene, when a repeat offender, grabbed and squeezed his sexy parole officer's boobs over and over again pretending he's checking her heartbeat, and she didnt seem to be bothered. That before Coogan, who saw that happened before his eyes,  turned on and kick his ass while moaning *not in this movie but i'm sure he was moaning 'I'm the main character here, yet i dont have such priviledge to squeze anyone's boobs, you ass hole'. Why i didnt see it as obscenity, that's very classic instead. I love that scene though i was little bit stimulated.

One thing i've to say here, this movie kind of remind me of local movie 'Kabayan Pergi Ke Kota' . And i noticed that a country sherrif's assistant, can be very funny and cool at the same time. Doesnt have to be as naive and stupid as Kabayan. Just because you want to be funny, doesn't mean u've to act stupidities. Just because you're stupid, doesn't mean you're funny. Just because you have Tukul Arwana's face, doesn't mean you're good looking. Just because you're wasting time reading here, doesn't mean you're getting smarter.

my rating: 7,5 of 10 (i can watch it again, and fast forward it straight away to boobs squeezing scene, legend!! err i'll change my messenger status into 'boobs squeezing', err i think thats a good name for my first incoming baby as well : 'boobs squeezing raharjo')